It seems very appropriate this Valentines Day to not talk about my wonderful husband but to talk about my first love: The Alpha and the Omega...Yeshua...Adonai...my Abba Father.
You see, I didn't always love Him very well. In fact, I even forgot about Him, which is even worse. I put Him away, put His very Word written to me, on a shelf to collect dust. I half-heartedly opened the Word when life was hard but I never knew what words to read. So I stumbled, flipping through the pages, and frustrated, slammed it shut, closed for another 3 months before I tried again.
I just didn't know how to love Him again. I didn't know where to start.
I would hear over and over again from the pulpit, "True freedom comes from praying and reading the Bible" and I would think, "What am I missing? I don't feel that."
Am I the only one who has felt this way? Somehow, I don't think so.
The problem was, I was waiting for this fluffy, lovey-dovey feeling to spur me on to open the Bible with renewed passion.
But God is not a God of feelings but of obedience. When obedience comes, feelings follow.
And to read His word is simply out of obedience. It's just that simple.
So, when December rolled around and some bloggers were going to read through the Bible in 90 Days, I almost threw up in my mouth at so much Bible reading. I mean, that's like 15 chapters a day! But it is exactly what God had in mind for me.
I felt the Holy Spirit impressing on my heart so strongly to take the challenge, to immerse myself in God's Word, once and for all. So I obeyed...albeit it grudgingly, but at least I obeyed.
Exactly 33 days ago today I opened to the book of Genesis and just started reading. The words lept off the page and ministered to my heart in ways I didn't know I needed ministering. It was like coming back to a very near and dear old friend. I devoured every single detail and promise laid out by God to His people. I became amazed at the specific timing of events and the way God stuck with His anointed ones so long.
Genesis became Exodus and quickly Leviticus, Numbers, Deuteronomy, etc. and etc. until now where I am in 2 Chronicles. The writer of 2 Chronicles is now recounting what was previously written so that the Israelities who were in exile for so many years
wouldn't forget where they had come from.
Oh isn't that me, Lord! I need to not forget where I came from. My roots are in You as my Creator and Lord. You loved me even before I was conceived. You knit me together in my Mother's Womb. My days are numbered by You. In You I find my beginning and my end. You are my all.
And so I will continue to set my alarm for 6:00 a.m. and will (most days) continue to leap out of bed, just so I can have my hour with Him. Some days I do the motions and miss an opportunity with Him... Other days, He meets me in a powerful way.
The important thing is that I don't stop reading and learning how to love Him.
I'm so thankful He loves me...
What about you? Have you been struggling with your quiet times? Is it hard for you to even open the Bible? I have been there and even now still have to be disciplined to finish the race I have started. Here are just a few quick things I have found that have helped me:
1.
Just start reading. If you don't know where to start, just start in the beginning and read in order. There are many Bible plans out there. Here's an example:
Bible Plan.Org or the one I am doing:
Bible in 90 Days. I think I waited so long to just start reading the Bible again because I wasn't sure where to start. Don't over complicate it! Just start reading and the love of the Word will come :)
2.
Get accountability and support. I knew upon signing up for the challenge that I would be having weekly check-ins with others who are doing the same challenge. Find someone to come alongside you! You can't do it alone, especially if it is not a formed habit yet.
3.
Be consistent. Whatever plan or schedule you want to do, just make sure you stick to it! It needs to be doable but also challenging at the same time. God is wanting to stretch you so don't make it too "cushy" :)
4.
Remember His love. Through all of this, don't lose sight of how much He loves that you are doing this! I have experienced more grace in just my day to day life, including my parenting since doing this challenge. He is gentle with those He loves!
Blessings to all my lovely readers today! Happy Valentines Day!
Know that you are loved :)
Christina
